Father’s Day

How do I celebrate or recognize Father's Day when I never met my father. My mom talked about him when things got rough that included the other two baby-daddies that my brother and sisters never met or knew.

My mom’s father beat and raped her and her older sister til she14 years old. The two of us left home after my sister told our mom that she was pregnant with his baby. Mom Wigged-out, beat the two of us and threw us out on the street in March, the coldest month of the year. I scraped and scrambled hard for my sister and me. Drug dealing, boosting, and robbed just to eat. When my nephew was born, ACS took him from us and I vowed never for that to happen to me. My sister went crazy. She was so heartbroken that she started smoking crack and any other drug to numb her pain.

After years of struggling and watching my sister self-destruct, I got pregnant with my son. My son’s father was an old dude twice my age with the “gift-gab” to talk any girl or boy out of their panties. After knocking me up he was out, not a phone call, not a visit, or a knock on the door! A year later I had another, my baby girl. My baby girl’s daddy beat me before and after my pregnancy for nine months straight as if I was a ragged doll and to blame for his demons. Now he is locked up and all I do is cry for him, shit I'm crying for all of us.

Today, I am staring out the window watching my son wondering what he will be as a man and father. It's crazy that he never ask for his father nor does he care.

Tomorrow, we are visiting my baby girl’s father. He is a stranger to the two, but he is the only man the two know or at least recognize as a “father.”

Not that the stranger was never there, he just didn't and couldn't care to be there or to listen to the cries of his and his “own” children. So, there you have it “Happy Father's Day!